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Tactics of a Narcissistic Mother by Gail Meyers

Flying Monkeys: No Contact or Low Contact

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© by Gail Meyers

A narcissistic personality disordered mother has flying monkeys. This is a term taken from The Wizard of Oz, where the flying monkeys do the bidding of the Wicked Witch.  The flying monkeys may be your neighbor, church members, siblings, aunts, uncles, grandmother, grandfather, nieces, nephews, etc. These people do the narcissist's dirty work and often pour their own abuse on the scapegoat.

I spent years of my life trying to show various flying monkeys the truth. It virtually never worked, not once in the twenty or so years I kept trying to "clear the air" or to finally be understood. They do not understand because they do not want to understand. Many are willfully ignorant and blind to the situation.  There is not some magical phrase and method you have not yet discovered that is suddenly going to cause these people to stand up for the truth.

What I have realized is the flying monkeys generally have their own reasons for behaving …

Narcissistic Mother: No Contact or Low Contact

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© by Gail Meyers Deciding to go low contact or no contact with your narcissistic personality disordered mother is a huge decision. Depending on where you are in your recovery process, it can feel anywhere from impossible or overwhelming, to mandatory and long overdue.
As you are considering what level of contact is best for you, look at the options. Yes, you have options. The choice is yours. We can not change anyone else, least of all a narcissistic mother. That leaves us to work on us. Some of the options are:
Maintain the same or reduced level of contact, but learn to handle your narcissistic mother differently. Put some new steps in an old dance.Reduce your contact to low contact with narcissistic mom, such as two hours a month for dinner.Temporarily separate from narcissistic mother to focus on your recovery.Decide to go no contact. The above options are discussed in sequential order.


Changing the Narcissistic Dance Some sons and daughters of narcissistic mothers are able t…

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